Where does anxiety come from? Each of us has a G-dly soul , an actual part of G-d Above. Our soul knows what is right, what is wrong, what is true and what is not. We may not always consciously understand it but we feel it. We are living in a world that conceals truth and is filled with darkness and impurity. We often go through conflicts within ourselves because we possess a G-dly soul and an animal soul (and the animal soul may not know how to interpret or react to certain things). The impact on our soul from the experiences we go through which are contrary to Torah and truth create anxiety. Even if those experiences are caused by the Almighty Himself for a purpose we cannot fathom, we feel anxious if we cannot relate to these experiences from a healthy or Torah perspective. This is why so many people struggle to understand suffering…..it is a human response to experiences we cannot understand. And the best response is prayer. Pleading for compassion from the Source of compassion…..we do not understand suffering but we know there is a deeper purpose and when we understand we CANNOT UNDERSTAND we then can stop questioning and pray and realign our thoughts and emotions with Torah and truth. This helps to maintain balance in a sometimes chaotic confusing world. But that is also why we pray for open revealed good.
If we do not align our lives, thoughts and actions with the truth of Torah , this will create anxiety on a constant basis.
If we suffer abuse or negative experiences from others who also do not align their actions with Torah, we also suffer anxiety: how can a person do such a thing, we wonder?
Our soul cannot bear to experience, hear about or see anything that is against truth or holiness. We may not always understand why we feel uncomfortable, but we do. And even though at times the truth can be covered over by impurity or negative emotions , somewhere deep inside the G-dly part of us protests and feels anxious.
Teshuvah (commonly translated as “repentance”) really means returning to and rediscovering that G-dly part within us that is always pure, is always holy and never wants to be separated from G-d for one moment. This is the truth within us: the voice of conscience.
Any time we go through challenges, we need to activate the G-dly soul, that holy potential within us, which has unlimited abilities and can overcome everything and bring us back to truth. That is the simple cry of the shofar on Rosh Hashanah, like a little child crying out to his father to save him.
This Yom Kippur may we merit to return to our true inner essence: to be healed from traumas and impurity and negativity. To return to that childlike innocence we possess. May we all merit a gemar chatima tova and a shana tova umetukah!